This framing is brilliant. The recursiveness angle is what really landed for me, becoming the father I needed has meant confronting exactly where my own dad fellshort but without bitterness. I've noticed that cultivating steadiness (something he never had) has changed how younger colleagues react to me at work, like they sense intuitvly that I can hold space for them. The imaginal father practice seems like accessing wisdom already inside us, just framed differently.
I became a paid member a little while ago, and I am so happy that I did. This article is both powerful and practical. It would be wonderful if more people would read this, gain some practical ideas, and we would all move past our limiting beliefs about our fathers and be the dad we never had:) Oh, what a world it could be.
Hey Rob, beautiful as usual, but I have a comment that I hope is taken as I intend, as food for thought. As a second parent to a beautiful daughter that just graduated college with two moms(I am mommy even though I am non-binary and fill in a fatherly role when needed) yet all she’s ever known is who her donor is and has met him a couple of times since he lives in Michigan. He was my best friend (and we two were Bon Jovi doppelgängers ) in the 1980s and continues to be a very close friend. But not a father. My own father was a high school football coach in the 1960s 70s and 80s. In Texas, no less. He was very threatened and jealous of my mother and my relationship that was so close, not without its own problems, but still… So he took it out on me by picking apart my body and calling me names. But I was there with him on his deathbed. My daughter‘s other grandfather just died three months ago and had many many failings. I kept thinking you might mention those born without fathers. In some ways you did as this beautiful article can be taken and re-shaped to fit that need. But I just thought I would mention it. I look forward to reading this every time it comes out so…Keep on keeping on. It’s a great newsletter!
As always, such good food for thought. My dad will be 90 in 2 weekd and our relationship has certainly evolved over the decades. I witness my adult children navigating their relationships with my ex. We humans are, and live in, complex ecosystems! Your wisdom, Rob, has been one of the voices in my head, and I'm grateful.
This applies well to “mother” too. Thank you for such a healing action post.
This framing is brilliant. The recursiveness angle is what really landed for me, becoming the father I needed has meant confronting exactly where my own dad fellshort but without bitterness. I've noticed that cultivating steadiness (something he never had) has changed how younger colleagues react to me at work, like they sense intuitvly that I can hold space for them. The imaginal father practice seems like accessing wisdom already inside us, just framed differently.
I became a paid member a little while ago, and I am so happy that I did. This article is both powerful and practical. It would be wonderful if more people would read this, gain some practical ideas, and we would all move past our limiting beliefs about our fathers and be the dad we never had:) Oh, what a world it could be.
This piece is greatly appreciated & will be saved!! What a fantastic take! 😺😺😺💕🦴
Hey Rob, beautiful as usual, but I have a comment that I hope is taken as I intend, as food for thought. As a second parent to a beautiful daughter that just graduated college with two moms(I am mommy even though I am non-binary and fill in a fatherly role when needed) yet all she’s ever known is who her donor is and has met him a couple of times since he lives in Michigan. He was my best friend (and we two were Bon Jovi doppelgängers ) in the 1980s and continues to be a very close friend. But not a father. My own father was a high school football coach in the 1960s 70s and 80s. In Texas, no less. He was very threatened and jealous of my mother and my relationship that was so close, not without its own problems, but still… So he took it out on me by picking apart my body and calling me names. But I was there with him on his deathbed. My daughter‘s other grandfather just died three months ago and had many many failings. I kept thinking you might mention those born without fathers. In some ways you did as this beautiful article can be taken and re-shaped to fit that need. But I just thought I would mention it. I look forward to reading this every time it comes out so…Keep on keeping on. It’s a great newsletter!
Brilliant plan for fathering aspects! Thank you
Thank you for this ❤️
Thank you so much for this insightful sharing
As always, such good food for thought. My dad will be 90 in 2 weekd and our relationship has certainly evolved over the decades. I witness my adult children navigating their relationships with my ex. We humans are, and live in, complex ecosystems! Your wisdom, Rob, has been one of the voices in my head, and I'm grateful.